Give yourself permission to fail, because His love never fails.

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This week has been tough in my house. I am learning patience with my children and it’s a battle. I used to feel like the worse Mom in the world because I didn’t know how to control my temper. I would get mad at my children for the smallest things. My expectations were so high that I got mad over spilled juice, handprints on the glass door, crumbs on the floor….and the list goes on. Until one day my four-year-old with fear in her voice told me something that radically changed my behavior. She told me with a soft voice, “Mommy you scare me when you yell.” In that moment, tears rolled down my face. I hugged her and told her, “Mommy is sorry. Do you forgive me?” She smiled up at me and told me, “yes mommy.” And then I told her I loved her. Just like that and she let it go, but I didn’t.  (I still get choked up recapping that.)

How did I let it get that far?  I told myself before I had children I was going to break the cycle of yelling. You don’t want to know the stories early on when I was dating and married to my husband. Yelling and not knowing how to communicate almost cost me to lose my husband. (that is for another blog post)   It seemed too common in my family. I didn’t want my daughter to grow up yelling.  I put fear in her heart and for a few weeks I walked around feeling guilty, ashamed, and embarrassed. I felt defeated and I failed. I prayed, and God was right there saying, “Daughter, I forgive you.” “I still love you” ” get up and try again” not in a audible voice, but in my Spirit. Just like my daughter quickly forgave me, God did too.  His love never fails me even when I may fail Him and others. I needed to let my children be human and make mistakes, just like I do.  So, sisters I am here to say, give yourself permission to fail, because His love for you never does. His mercy and grace remains. It doesn’t even have to pertain to motherhood. But any type of failure in your life you may be feeling. I fail sometimes at making the right decisions in my life. We are fallible and warped women. But our adequacy comes from God and not of ourselves. (2 cor 3:5)

 I want them to see that their mother is flawed, but by the grace of God he has the power to evoke beauty from failure.” `Angela Nasworth

The start of my journey started a little over a year ago, learning to communicate with my children in a different way. That is with Jesus help! Let’s read what Jesus says when we look to Him:

Come unto me, all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart: and you shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30 NKJV

This verse has been my rock. One I have memorized in my heart. I ask that he helps me treasure his words in my heart that I may not sin against him..(Psalm 119:11) He is never too far from us. He invites us to come to Him, open up to Him, and let him know how we are feeling. We just have to go to Him knowing He is there to listen. That is such a privilege. (tears) God has been and he is teaching me how to show more grace toward my children by:

  • thinking before I speak ..swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger (James 1:19-20)…I find it ironic that its says first we should be quick to hear and everything else is slow. Think about it, when we are slow to speak we can think before we speak. When we are slow to anger it gives us the chance to react in a kind way.
  • listening more-it’s amazing how communication works better when I drop what I am doing and listen.
  • letting go of control and seeking God to help me control my anger
  • reassuring my children-accidents happen
  • sweet reminder-meek and quiet spirit is precious to God (1 peter 3:5) (strength under control)
  • allow my children to see me mess up so they know mommy and daddy makes mistakes too.
  • treat them the way I want to be treated (respect, kindness,etc)
  • And here is the big one…God knows and sees everything. That keeps my heart in check. I want to please him.

I’ve seen a big difference. I’ve also seen growth and setbacks, but it’s a process and one I might never get right. But I’ve learned humility, compassionate, empathy and generosity is all born out of failure.  Praying for all the women who feel like a failure that you see that the Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abundant in mercy. (Psalm 103:8) It’s through the failures that we grow and mature in Christ.

My flesh and my heart fails, but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever. NKJV

How does he help you through failures? Is there a verse you would like to share.. Leave a comment and let me know.

Looking Unto Jesus,

Rebecca

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FMF: Paint

Quote-Vincent-Van-Gogh-paint**Imagine us sitting across from each other drinking a cup of tea or whatever your favorite drink is..because I am here to encourage your heart**

PAINT AWAY friend! Yes you! Paint away with your words…silence that inner critic– that tells you your words don’t matter. silence the inner critic– that tells you your story is worthless –nobody will care.. Because friend God says your words matter…your story matters..if you think no one cares, He cares.. His presence is there and he sees you writing your heart out…maybe to speak for a conference, or preparing a message for your bible study group, or a blog post.. Silence the inner critic–that says you can’t do it and that you’re not a leader because you don’t have a “title” next to your name…When you do that voice is silenced giving no more room for the enemy’s lies.  Words of life bring healing to a hurting soul….Words of life..bring hope to someone who feels hopeless..It will get messy in the process, but it will look beautiful in the end because Jesus uses beautiful imperfect people to bear His name. He created unique individuals that he molded and crafted into a beautiful painted picture of His grace & mercy. We are ALL in need of this everyday. And we want YOUR story, YOUR words,  not someone else’s. There is no one like you in this world…(message to myself). Check out what Romans 12 verse 4,5,6 says…

For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function,so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to exercise them accordingly… Romans 12:4,5,6

LOVE! So encouraging sisters. We don’t have the same function. We have gifts that are different according to the grace given to us. We are so undeserving for Him to  speak through us, BUT by his Grace we are privileged and we should honor that gift. Whatever gift he has blessed us with.

So go paint on with your words, speaking, serving… silence that inner critic… He sees you and that is what matters…:- )

Linking up with FMF brave writers. Please join us here it’s a great community.

Blessings,

Rebecca

A Fresh Start

no filter..picture taken behind my new backyard:)

no filter..picture taken behind my new backyard:)

Welcome to my new writing place. It’s a fresh start for a new season the Lord has me in from my marriage, my children/home, and relationships. I’ve been at blogger since 2007, however I’ve been writing about Jesus since 2001. (This place shall be where I stay put. After blogger I went to weebly and I didn’t really like it. So here I am at wordpress. I posted a few blog posts at weebly but I couldn’t transfer the posts or comments. I appreciate y’all encouragement!)

I’ve been praying for the last three months about this blog. Honestly, I thought it was time for me to step away for good, but every time I am away from blogging. I am compelled to write and encourage others. The last post I wrote there was back in December of last year.  I was letting y’all know my one word for 2014. Which by the way it’s TRUST. The year before that it was FEARLESS. It’s been a process for me with that word fear, but I am continuing on my journey with that word even though my word this year is trust. You see although I have faced some of my fears I realized it took a lot of me trusting in God to get me through those fears. I was facing them head on and God was helping me through them. I was trusting God and putting it into action and not just speaking words. Now I am learning when you trust in God…fear starts to diminish..when I choose to trust there is peace in my circumstances. Fear cripples my freedom and keeps me in a cage and I refuse to stay there. I want to be free like a bird don’t you? I will obey His word and believe what I read word by word…verse by verse. Cheers to a fresh start! I am here to encourage your heart as God speaks to me through his precious word. I want to write more about my passions in hope to bring awareness for those who don’t have a voice.  Thanks for coming along this faith journey of mine. I truly am grateful for you dear reader who takes the time and reads what I have to say. Most of all I hope whatever I write it compels us to search the scriptures and seek God more:)


Those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.. Isaiah 40:31

With Love,
Rebecca